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My dog fears me. How do I build a strong, loving bond with her now?

Updated on September 23rd, 2025

Pet's info: Dog | Mixed Breed Medium (23 - 60lb) | Female | spayed | 11 months and 23 days old | 45 lbs

I’ve been hard on my dog in the past when she’s done something wrong. But that was a long time ago, and I’ve worked on myself as a person since then. And most of the time she’s a great dog, but sometimes when I try to scold her now I think she still fears me. I want her to know how much I love her and that I’ve changed. I need advice on how to develop a strong bond with her. I just wish I could change what I’ve done in the past but I can’t. So now I need help. I love her so much.

1 Answer

Most Helpful Answer

Answered By Makenzie Kurth, DVM

Veterinarian

Published on August 22nd, 2018

Thanks for using Petco Pet Education Center, formerly Petcoach and for being brave enough to ask this question. The great news is that Callie is young! The best things I can recommend for bonding are training and play. Training doesn’t have to be rigid or be done for hours a day. Work on fun tricks together and if you feel that you (or Callie) is getting frustrated, stop for a break or try the next day. Training is so positive because it gives Callie clear expectations with predictable consequences and increases her trust in you as she learns to understand that you will react the same each time.

Play is also important but obvious avoid any actions that she might be wary of. Eg, be sure to throw things away from her to fetch rather than toward her as she might confuse this with you throwing something AT her. In general, sqautting down to be at her level and keeping your hands mostly palm-up are helpful in avoiding scenarios that might make her anxious.

Exercise in any form is good for her mental health and will decrease anxiety in general.

I hope this helps and I wish you and Callie all the best in a brand new, wonderful relationship.

1Pet Parents found this answer helpful

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